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School Bullying

Bullying is horrible!

Bullying is harmful in every way!

Bullying can lead to suicide/death.

Bullying is a condemned behavior regardless of who and where it takes place.

Bullying is a cycle that needs to be ended!

What is bullying?

Bullying is a vibrational game!

Where the bully is repetitively being hostile to someone, so over and over again, with hurtful intentions, to deliberate cause psychological harm to another person.

 

The bullying can happen verbal, physical or social.

It can happen everywhere: at home, school, bus, with friends/in a group, at the workplace. Phone calls, emails and social media.
 

Almost in every cases 1 of 4 children in the USA are being bullied.

A 2019 survey by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) found that 19.5% of ninth through twelfth graders were bullied on school property in the 12 months prior to completing the questionnaire.

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In 2019 the National Center for Education Statistics and Bureau of Justice did a survey and indicates that, nationwide, about 22% of students’ ages 12–18 experienced bullying.

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Moreover, a study by the World Health Organization (WHO) conducted in 2013 and 2014 in 42 countries in Europe and North America found that, on average, 14% of 11-year-old boys and 11% of 11-year-old girls were bullied at least twice in the previous two to three months.

BULLYING: a vibrational game!

Bullying is a vibrational game!

Why? You have to understand that everything in this world/life is energy, frequency and vibration.

All humans, plants, animals and Mother Nature.

(Nikola Tesla:” If you want to find the secrets of the Universe, think in terms of energy, frequency and vibration.”)

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Every emotion corresponds with an amount of vibration in your body.
(The Human Vibrational Chart)

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You can be in a high or low energy, frequency and vibration.
HIGH energy, frequency or vibration is when you feel love, joy, happiness, peace, bliss and enlightment.

Low energy, frequency and vibration is when you are feeling: shame, guilt, apathy, grief, fear, anger, jealousy, envy, worry, pain and not being able to forgive.

People who are in a higher vibration attract others that also are in a high vibrational state.

On the other hand, individuals in lower vibrations most likely attract others in the same energetic field.

 

Like attracts like.

Why is bullying a vibrational game?

Why does the bully bully?
 

The bully is in a low vibrational state.

He feels unworthy, unloved, unconfident/insecure.

He seeks attention, he feels powerless.

He is jealous of others.

  • He suffered from an emotional trauma. His parents abandoned him/her emotionally or psychically. He didn’t have his needs met. Or he was bullied before and now he does it, to feel powerful. He is more likely to bully/abuse his own children, partner and/or colleagues at the workplace. As manager/supervisor he bullied his subordinates because he feels superior to others and/or to deflect attention from his incompetence.
     

    Because if a bully don’t heal his child's trauma, he will be more inclined to continue to bully others as a child and as an adult.
     

    That’s why it is imperative, crucial, and vital to end this cycle.
     

    HURT PEOPLE, hurt people.

    IF they don’t heal their traumas! Some victims, victimize others!

    That’s why this needs to end. The only way is by healing!

    Both need healing!
     

    The bully as a child or adult is a wounded, hurt, unhealed parasite! Why parasite?
     

    And now you will understand: why bullying is a vibrational game! 

    What is happening on a vibrational, frequency level….
     

    The vibration of the bully is low, he makes others feel bad, to have the ILLUSION to feel better. He distracts others from his feeling of hurt, unconfident and unworthy, he seeks attention by making others feel bad, lowering others' vibration and stealing others' vibration. The bully parasites on the vibration of others.
     

    When you feel bad, your vibration lowersss, but his vibration stays the same, he FEELS better, but his vibration didn’t get higher. It is an illusion.

Why the bully picks up certain individuals? (child/adult)

The bully targets an individual mostly because this child or adult is also in a lower frequency.

Because these individuals are in a low vibrational energy.
 

“People feel what you feel about you”. This is a universal law!
 

The way anyone feels about themselves: this is the energy that is been emanate. So people around you will feel this.

 

The bully is in a low vibrational state, so he feels all that is energetically in a low frequency.

He targets an individual that:

  • Is insecure, unconfident (because he/she is short, has acne, is poor)

  • has a low self esteem (because having acne, being poor, having dyslexia)

  • feels unworthy,

  • feels unloved.

 

A child also might become a target of bullying if he is:

  • most of the time alone/not having many friends.

  • lack of social skills/can’t make friends.

  • Teasing is a bit normal. It is friendly and playful.

    Children or friends sometimes tease each other a little bit.

  • ​If teasing become hurtful, with the deliberate intention to humiliate the other. Being hostile, offensive and malicious to the other. That is BULLYING. At this level humiliated words are being used. (spoken or written).

    • Hurtful teasing. 

    • Name calling.

    • Spreading rumors.

    • Leaving out of the group/Intentional exclusion.

    • Insult.

    • Inappropriate sexual comments. (sexual bullying)

    • Tauting.

    • Homophobic/racist remarks/making fun (of your skin color, your accent, clothes, food you eat, your country) = Racism bullying.

    • Threatening to cause harm.

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    Verbal bullying is not easy to proof or to recognize because amongst children it happens when authority figures are not present.

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    Social Bullying/Relational Bullying (emotional harm/social manipulation).

    • Lying and spreading rumors.

    • Leaving someone outside the group on purpose.

    • Telling others not to be friends with someone.

    • Embarrassing someone in public.

    • Damage someone’s social reputation or relationships.

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    Research shows girls are more often the victims of relational bullying than boys. But boys and girls are equally likely to be perpetrators.

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    Cyber Bullying (emotional harm/social manipulation).

    • Making online threats. (is against the law)

    • Posting hurtful texts, mail, videos, images, posts.

    • Spreading gossip/rumors online.

    • Imitating others online.

    • Deliberately excluding others online.

  • Psychical bullying is the most obvious type of bullying. 
    Psychical bullying is perpetration by an individual or a group.(= aggression)
    The bully or the group bully:

    • beat up another: hitting, slapping, kicking, blocking, spitting, pushing, tripping, pinching, assault.
       

    • manipulate, extort, threaten the other (that he/she shouldn’t tell anyone)/intimidation.
       

    • steals, destroys possession. (destruct) (disappearance of documents)
      This is a crime: (therefore against the law)
       

    • touching unwanted and inappropriate way. (sexual bullying)(sexual remarks, snaps your bra, stare at your body in a desire way)
       

What can be the effects for the target of bullying?

Bullying can have serious psychical and mental/psychological effects on the targeted individual. (Children and adults). Most are psychological.
 

The targeted child​

  • Feels scared/afraid, not safe.

  • Feels lonely, sad, angry, confused.

  • Feels unconfident/low self esteem.

  • Feels unworthy.

  • Doubts his/herself. (self doubt)


The common affects are

  • Sleep difficulties.

  • Anxiety and depression.

  • Constant worry about school even in free time.

  • Not wanted to go to school/work.

  • Absence of school/work.

  • Lower school/academic performance. (concentration problems) Less output of work. (demotivation)

  • Dropping out of school. (demotivation)

  • Avoid social activities.

  • Want to do psychical harm on yourself. (suicidal)

  • Health issues. (psychical/sick)

  • Death. (suicide)

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Even bystanders that witnessed bullying are at risk of having mental issues and increased substance abuse. They can be more absent from school and the workplace.

What can be the effects of bullying for the bully?

  • Substance abuse.

  • More chance to get into fights.

  • Vandalism.

  • Sexual activities at a young age.

  • Abuse children, partner and co-workers.

How to cope with bullies as a targeted child?

Advice for the child that is being bullied.
 

Be aware that the bully is a wounded, hurt, UNHEALED parasite!

He has a problem. It is NOT about you.

 

Never bully back.

This makes things worse.

 

Tell someone.

It is important not to keep this negative experience inside. But to tell your parents, a teacher, the principal or a good friend.

 

Get a buddy/Make friends.

Especially as a child/teen at school is good to have a good friend that can function as a witness or can intervene.

 

React only if you are prepared and feel strong enough.

If so, address their behavior. Otherwise avoid reacting. By walking away, the bully doesn’t have control over you.

 

Avoid contact as much as possible.

This can be difficult as a child at school, if you are in the same class. Avoid contact before, after school and between classes. Create safe places to be with friends.

 

Go to the authorities.

If you are threated and you feel unsafe.

Which actions can parents of a targeted child of school bullies take?

Advice for parents of children that are being bullied.
 

  • AS A PARENT BE AWARE THAT YOUR SUPPORT IS CRUCIAL!

    The consequence of the bullying is that he feels ashamed.
     

  • Parents should explain their child​

    • What is bullying, so they can identify it.

    • That bullying is never acceptable. THAT IT ISN’T HIS FAULT!

    • How to react and always come and talk to them.

    • It is also crucial that parents make sure that their own child is not a bully. That they explain the consequences of being a victim of bullying (psychological effects)
       

  • Listen to your child

    Take your child seriously. Don’t criticize your child.Create a safe environment for your child to talk to you.
     

  • Have a conversation with the school

    ​Talk with the school (teacher and/or principal). Ask if the school has an anti -bullying program. Make sure they take the situation seriously. And protect your child as much as possible to not be in contact with the bully (before  and after school or between classes.The school has to put someone in place that listens to your child and all children that are bullied. If the school are cooperative, you can switch school.
     

  • Assertiveness or self-defense training

    It is essential that your child is secure and confident of his/herself. The bully targets mostly children that are in a low vibrational state.
     

  • Encourage your child to make friends

    Having friends around makes your child feel safe and he won’t feel alone.

In some cases, these tips don't help to really stop the bullying.

 

It is important to stop the bullying and it is very crucial to heal this trauma.

Yes, bullying is a traumatic experience.

 

If bullying it is not treated, it leaves scares.

That’s why it is vital to seek help for your child.

If you were bullied at school in the past and you didn’t heal this trauma.

This pain must be dealt with.
 

In my coaching program, I coach your child step by step on how to stop the bullying and to heal.

According to the specific case of you or your child.

The tips above are general.

1. Teasing (verbal)
2. Verbal bullying and emotional harm
3.Physical bullying

There is 3 levels of bullying

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